Question by -LMAO-: Long story. Please help me out guys and girls. Why would he treat me this way/do this to me?
I have a friends with benefits. We are more friends, than benefits. We are like best friends, we have each others backs through everything. Always there for one another. Well, the hard part is that I like him and he is still in love with his ex from like 4 years ago. We have maintained out friendship even with the unrequited feelings. We went on Vacation, we go out, buy each other bday and christmas gifts. He wanted to be with me in the beginning then he said the timing was bad because we arent in the best places in our lives. (which is correct). But through out this friendship we have gotten into alot of fights because he will every couple of weeks change his mind and say that he wants us to be together. Then he will decide to take it back the next day or so. We get into huge fights about this, he claims he made a mistake, blah, blah, blah, then after not speaking for 2-5 days we are back to normal. Well the last time he did this, i thought our friendship was done for good. He said, Fine if you can accept that I made a mistake then we dont have to talk anymore, i’ll block your number and you online. I said fine, thats for the best anyway. He never did it and a day later we are talking, 2 days later hanging out again. Just yesterday, he asks me to be his girlfriend again only this time he sends me that stupid as tag for a relationship on facebook. I accept, not thinking he would actually take it back after all our friends and family see it but guess whaaaaat? lol I’ll get to that part. Anyway after he asks me and i accept, he invites me to his games the next morning, I accept as well because i love watching him play. He calls me at like 8 am because he didnt go to sleep yet, says he probably wont be cable to wake up in time for game so his brother in law is gonna take him and he will pick me up if/after they win first game, so i can watch the 2nd game. He texts me, they lost, but we continue to text about the college football games on tv….when its time for 2nd game at 6. He leaves and never mentions picking me up. Then after game he sleeps till around 12am, i fb chat him…he is short with me then i see he changed his status to single. I call him, but he doesnt answer then signs off fb…and turns off phone. I’m really upset because, our whole families saw it, gave me congratulations and his friends were excited, saying its about time…and all that. Then he goes and takes it all back without saying a word to me about it.
why does he keep doing this? Is he scared? He isnt a mean guy, like he would never purposefully hurt anyone. I just dont understand were he is coming from when he does this to me.
We are both in our early to late 20′s in that helps in understanding the situation. He is the older one, I’m thinking that may add to the problem.
It just happened and I’m still emotionally raw right now. I just wrote everything I could think of that was important. I probably rambled on too much and there are probably a ton of grammar issues. Sorry, Thank you for reading and giving your opinion though! I appreciate it.
Best answer:
Answer by Jessie Geronimo
Guys can be jerks sometimes. Just go with what you feel in your heart .
Give your answer to this question below!
4 Responses
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armed with a :) Says:
He has a lot of baggage and doesn’t know what he wants. Please don’t date this guy and you probably shouldnt stay too close of friend’s with him. He’s not treating you right, probably won’t soon, you desire better. You don’t need the extra stress and hurt he causes you. This might sound harsh but it sounds like you need some tough love.
Please answer mine?http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AsDaK_29iGgWvdhe4h9MmGgM_dw4;_ylv=3?qid=20110918230354AAmEX2K
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tagboy Says:
Short and sweet this guy doesn’t know what he wants and all he will accomplish is to drive you nuts. Sorry love but you two aren’t even close to a match.
I just dont understand were he is coming from, Same old thing he’s scared to death to love you.
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Steve Berman Says:
I’m sorry to hear that is happening to you. I also have personal experience in an almost identical situation.
I was with a girl and we were also friends with benefits, and I would constantly do the same thing to her. I was very flakey when it came to our relation ship… really me emotions towards her were a bit of a roller coaster. Since those days I have matured a bit and understand why I did what I did.
In my case I was very insecure sexually and jealous of her other relationships. Also drinking would affect my moods and cause me to say things I didn’t necessarily mean. He is probably troubled with some sort of insecurity or jealousy and deals with it by swinging from one extreme to another to make himself feel like he is in control of the situation.
My guess is that he is very likely immature emotionally… Personally Id just let him and the whole situation go. I doubt it will ever end up well for you too if you are together, its best just to get out now and let him deal with things on his own and maybe mature emotionally.
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Lindal. Says:
Hes probably still waiting for his ex to come around.and if your the one spending the money to do all these things with him and giving him sex everytime he needs it.Well”what else can i say,but that he is using you; friends with benefits remember,I’ll scratch your back and you scratch minds.And when he see’s that your getting too attached he lets go of you for awhile.Till he needs you again for whatever reason. he’s got something good going on with you.And it ain’t love.Someone who loves you doesnt hurt you this way.In anyway for that matter. Guys always play games like that.But you have to show them that the ball is in your court now.And if he keeps doing this to you he needs to move on for whoever he thinks is gonna take his crap.Dont be wasting your time.Whatever he has to say doesnt mean crap anyway…..
